Questions, asked and answered
Frequently asked questions
Where the door is, when we open, and whether any of this is real.
The practical ones
Finding us, and when
Where exactly is Kaldo's?
Rear entrance of the DADAA Building, 92 Adelaide Street, Fremantle WA 6160. Around the back of the building, not on the Adelaide Street frontage. Clancy's Fish Pub is next door and the Fremantle Markets are a short walk. If you're looking at the front of the building, keep going around. Directions and the phone number are on the visit page.
What are your opening hours?
Monday to Thursday, 7am – 3pm. Friday and Saturday, 7am – midnight. Sunday, 9am – 3pm. The late Friday and Saturday hours are deliberate: somewhere quiet to sit after dinner, next to Clancy's, with coffee and something to eat.
When do you open?
1 October 2026. We're fitting out the space now. If the date shifts we'll say so here and on the home page. For anything before then, call 0439 999 409.
Is there parking? How do I get to the door?
We haven't checked parking bays or bus routes ourselves, so we won't publish them.
What we know: rear entrance, DADAA Building, 92 Adelaide Street, Fremantle. Around the back, next to Clancy's, a short walk from the Markets. For parking, prams or wheelchair access, call 0439 999 409 and ask.
Do you do catering?
Ask us. 0439 999 409. We'd rather talk it through than publish a package before we've opened.
The eating ones
Coffee, food, and what Kaltorans eat
Is there a menu yet?
The food menu isn't published yet. It goes up shortly before we open on 1 October, once it's finished and tested. Passport holders will be told.
Do you do coffee?
Yes. The coffee menu is settled and you can read it now. Espresso, flat white, long black, latte, cappuccino, piccolo, magic, mocha, batch brew, cold brew, iced drinks, tea and hot chocolate, with oat, soy, almond and lactose-free milk. Prices go on the board at the counter.
What is Kaltoran street food?
Warm, fresh food, wrapped so you can take it with you. The cooking is done ahead of time, so it's quick. The longer version is here.
There's a national dish. It's warm, and that's all we're saying until the menu goes up.
Do I have to learn Kaltori to order?
No. Fremantle speaks English and so do we. But Kallo! means hello, Meru! means thanks, and Eta bena! means eat well, if you feel like it. The beginner's guide takes a few minutes.
The other ones
Kaltora, the passport, and the woman at the border
Is Kaltora a real country?
No. We invented it so we could invent a cuisine. If the many-worlds interpretation of quantum mechanics is right, it probably exists somewhere. In the story it's been the Land of the Hearth since roughly 3200 BC, with sixty-one million people, a constitutional monarchy and a currency named after a goat. The full write-up is here.
What is the Kaltoran passport, and does it cost anything?
It's free, and it can't be refused. Refusal isn't among the powers of the office that issues it.
You apply at kaldos.cafe/passport/, where Lyra Kaelor, the Kallvena, stamps first and reads the form afterwards. The passport is stored only on your own device. We don't keep a copy, and there's nothing to pay. She'll ask whether you've eaten. It changes nothing.
Who is Lyra Kaelor?
She's the Kallvena [kal-VEH-na], the One Who Welcomes: the border officer of Kaltora's Ministry of Hospitality, and the mascot of Kaldo's. In the story she's been in the post eleven years and has never turned anyone away, because the job doesn't allow it. Kaltora's border is a post, not a wall. Her page is here.
Why is a Fremantle café calling itself an embassy?
Because it's funny, and because the rules we wrote for the country are the rules we run the café by. Feed people first. Keep a spare place set. The King holds our Royal Warrant and still owes us 178 Dolluk. We don't say what for.
Still stuck?
Ask a human
If your question is a real one, about access, catering, a pram, an allergy, or which side of the building to walk around, the fastest answer is a phone call.